Modern day family time

Living in the modern days, when families have to schedule their lives ,and also all members of the family are part of organized activities. Makes true family time very difficult, limited and sometimes non realistic. Specialty when many kids are raised by two working parents or by a single parent. That is why two different organizations produced videos to promote their programs that focus on family play time. Family Well Being based in Chicago, Illinois and Plum Parent Support based in Wellington, New Zealand are organizations that educate parents the importance of letting their kids just be a kid. They do it by making playgroups which all members of the family are a part of it, and they bring the old style playtime back into their lives. The videos they each have produce focus on different aspects, which affect the way the viewer feels about the organizations. While both organizations are successful in helping parents understand their kids minds and both benefit the family in a great way, the second video from Plum Parent Support is far more appealing to modern parents than the video from “Family Well Being”.

     The images shown in the videos from both organizations appeal emotionally to the viewer. The videos show images of kids playing and having fun. For example the first video from Family Well Being included kids playing in playgrounds, families celebrating in a festival, and camping out in the woods. But again, unfortunately these images do not last long. The video focuses almost the entire time on the staff and their opinion, making it hard for the viewer to grasps the activities involve in the program. On the other hand, the second video Plum Parent Support reaches it audience more effectively. This video focuses on the kids, parents and staff in action. The images included little kids trying on rubber boots, Willow holding a guinea pig with kids feeding it grass, big trees that attracts beautiful birds. The kids faces were attentive  to the story time because Willow tells stories using small wooden characters instead of conventional books. By using all these cute and innocent images, the second film from Plum Parent Support appeals more effectively to modern families who are hungry to experience nature and their kids to be involved in more hands on education, rather than traditional large classrooms.

Similarly for what we can see from the videos, the facilities where the organizations operate are very different. First, the organization Family Well Being has a large facility, many classrooms, sports fields and large playgrounds. While all this looks fun for kids and parents, it can also defeat its purpose. These kinds of facilities tend to look like schools where kids spend their days in, and does not offer a special place to the family. In addition to that, by meeting in a large playground, families tend to divide in groups such as kids playing, moms on one side and dads on the other side. For this reason, combined with grey color walls, the large facility does not offer an environment to interact with each other as a family. On the contrary, the second organization Plum Parent Support operates its program from the founder’s house. The house has been carefully converted into a place where kids can image and explore. From the video, the viewer can see many images: the  living room where they tell stories and dress up, the office where the founder meets with families and get to know them individually, and the backyard with stone paths, plants, big birds and birds. This type of environment is more attractive to parents because in modern society most people spend their days inside large buildings and away from home. That is why, Plum Parent Support offers the viewer something they are wishing for because the sense of care is always present.

While both videos are trying to reach modern families and both organizations have great things to offer. The filmmaker from the second video has made better decisions. Despite that the first video from Family Well Being has a wider audience because they show images of kids from all ages. A lot of the times this families with kids in school have tight schedules and have no room for a another activity to be involve in. Also, parents with kids in school grades are less concern on what they do with the kids, since they are already learning at school and are busy with chores, homeworks and other activities. Meanwhile, the second video from Plum Parent Support has its audience narrowed to toddlers and preschoolers. Families with small children are always concern for their children’s education, since studies has shown that the first three years of life are critical in the child’s mind. Parents with kids that do not attend school are also looking for something to do with them. All things considered, the second video from Plum Parent Support is more effective. it shows a unique organization that care for the development of young minds, preparing them for the future and therefore have a better world for the next generation.



Parents, take time for yourselves!

Many texts explain the benefits to parents when they take time alone, but in the article Parents, Kids and Time Alone author Margaret Paul explains that there are benefits to children when parents take time for themselves. She aims to convince parents that there is no reason to feel guilty about taking time for themselves, and that it will actually benefit their children, making them stronger more well-rounded adults. Margaret Paul successfully helps her readers to understand that by taking time alone and making sure their children understand that people need their own time, as well as family and couple time, parents actually help to avoid narcissistic tendencies, to respect other’s time, and ultimately to take responsibility for their own actions and feelings.

Margaret Paul effectively argues that spending time alone is actually being a good parent, because it shows their child that it is important to take loving care of yourself as well as others. Another way a parent can show the importance of time alone is to spend time pursuing their work, hobbies and passions. This will help the child to find the things that ignite their own passions, and allow them to find ways to entertain themselves and spend time alone without feeling uncomfortable. Unfortunately the author states this is something most people do not know how to do, due to constantly being set in front of the TV or constantly entertained by their parents as children. This causes a child to become dependent on others for entertainment and joy. As well as being dependent on others for entertainment purposes, if parents are never taking any time for themselves, never giving their children the opportunity to make independent decisions, they are teaching their children that there will always be someone there who is responsible for meeting their needs

Even without the use of background information or evidentiary support, Margaret Paul successfully makes the very salient point that parents need to spend time alone for their own health, and for the emotional wellbeing of their child. She makes sure that parents understand that by allowing their child to take all of their time the child will develop dependent, narcissistic and selfish tendencies, where as if the child is allowed to see their parents being independent of them and each other, they learn to find their own joy in life and to respect the personal time of others. By taking time alone parents guide their children to healthy, well rounded adults.

Schedule a Fun Date

 For many married couples, the thought of going out on a date the same way they used to do it before they married is almost forgotten. Taking out the trash and scrapping the grease off the spaghetti pan is not romantic, but it must be done. A lot of times an outsider has to come to revive the romance in the marriage. That is why Michael Systma writes the article “Schedule a Fun Date”, to help married couples bring the dating era back into their lives. 

            The article “Schedule a Fun Date” was written by Michael Systma, PhD is a nationally counselor and a certified sex therapist. The article was published in the Wesleyan Life Magazine on the October 2010 edition. This article can also be found at www.wesleyanlifeonline.com/article/166. The article “Schedule a Fun Date” is successful because it helps married couples with busy schedules to intentionally schedule a fun date with their spouse, and effectively provides tips to facilitate success on the date.

In the article, the author provides important information to facilitate success on a fun date. He does this successfully by breaking it into six points that he calls “simple rules”, helping the reader to remember the rules easier than if he had presented a single paragraph containing a lot of information that the reader will have to put into practice. That is why the message, is divided into six points, giving the illusion of less words. The simple rules are, Take Initiative, Plan Ahead, Make it Fun, Ask your Spouse Out,  Don’t go there, and Make it a Tradition. This simple rules which are in bold and set aside, clearly describe the plan to follow when going out on a date, because the author uses simple, common and everyday language, such as when he explains that “jumping on a car, looking at each other and asking ‘So, what do you want to do?’ does not make for a fun date”. If the reader has only few minutes to look at the magazine and scam through the article, he or she will have the motivation and the tools from the simple rules to go and ask the spouse out.

After reading the simple rules and its explanation, the author facilitates success on the fun date. With the simple rules he is eliminating all the things that may cause trouble on the date such as “Don’t talk about controversial topics”. He also suggests to make the date a tradition and a formal event, for example when he mentions to “Ask your spouse out by using a card or a phone call and by making the date a biweekly tradition”. The author is not setting rules that can not be modified by the reader; instead he is presenting a sample plan to help couples reach a more romantic mood and therefore an intimate closeness in the relationship. 

Finally,  as a married person, I recommend this article to all  married couples that are not yet dating their spouses on a regular basis. After reading it, they will know a single step that will improve their marriage. Families start as a couple, and because the family is the center of society. Dating our spouse will impact our world in a positive way, as a result of investing time, resources and effort to the relationship.

Authors argue kids need time alone

Many parents feel guilty about taking time for themselves, without realizing that when a parent takes time for themselves it is not only beneficial for them, but for their child as well. In the articles Parents Kids and Time Alone by Margaret Paul and Kids Need Time for Themselves by Peggy Drexler have many similar points that, while expressed differently, work to make the point that time alone is actually beneficial to a child and helps them to grow into a more self-sufficient adult. Both articles argue that when a child’s time is constantly filled for them, it stifles their ability to entertain themselves. The articles also agree on the point that when a child is given all of their parents time it causes the child to feel that others are responsible for filling their time for them, and it causes the child to be whiny, demanding, and easily bored. A third point that the articles agree on is that children should be taught at an early age the importance of being alone. However, the article Kids Need Time for Themselves makes one point that isn’t made in Parents Kids and Time Alone, which is that in an attempt to keep children from becoming bored and to work off some energy by constantly keeping their children entertained, some parents actually do more harm than good because the children then actually even look at alone time as a punishment. While both articles effectively make basically the same point, by the use of real life examples, Kids Need Time for Themselves author Peggy Drexler argues the point better than Parents Kids and Time Alone author Margaret Paul does.

            Many parents today, due to long work hours or as an attempt to stave off boredom in their young children, spend every free moment they have with them. Playing sports or video games, taking them to the park or a movie or a live sporting event. On the surface this seems like a good idea and a show of loving parenting. But in both articles the authors discuss how this can actually be harmful to a child’s emotional development. In Parents Kids and Time Alone author Margaret Paul states that this behavior gives a child bad role modeling. It teaches them to be dependent on others to fill their time and inhibits them from finding out what activities they enjoy on their own. This is a good argument, but it lacks depth due to the absence of either hard fact or something to relate it to real life. Whereas in Kids Need Time for Themselves, author Peggy Drexler makes the same point, but she uses the real life example of Tommy, a seven year old boy whose mother is always filling up his time with “boy things”. As stated in the article, when Tommy gets home from school every day he asks his mother “what do we do now”? And every day his mother, Maggie, has an activity planned, and she always stops whatever she’s doing at the time to do the activity with Tommy until his father gets home from work and can then take over. Because his parents always have activities planned, which they put before everything else, Tommy never has to think of activities himself. Drexler relates this act of spoiling children with time to spoiling children with material goods, and says it has the same effect of creating a spoiled adult.